Remembrance Rebooted

Does Remembrance need a reboot? 

We want to honour and respect the courage and sacrifices of our armed forces. I believe that means recognising that they aren’t superhuman. They are flawed people with struggles, blind spots, weaknesses, strengths, and everything else that makes all of us human.  

Despite this they choose to do incredibly difficult jobs. To me, that’s what is truly impressive. 

Working at BFBS has given me exposure to plenty of people who have served. I never have.  

But I’ve noticed that using the word veteran to describe them will nearly always result in a grimace. 

It’s a word loaded with meaning and purpose. So why doesn’t it feel natural to many of those who did serve?   

What do you picture when you hear ‘Veteran?’ 

For many it might be an old soldier who fought in the Second World War standing in front of the Cenotaph. Or perhaps someone ‘mad, bad, or sad,’ a homeless, traumatised alcoholic on the streets. 

Of course there are people like the above. But it’s not the norm by any means. It’s right the nation pays its respects to those who have served, those who supported them, and those who never came home.  

I wonder though. Do these formal, reverential events feel right to those who struggled with their time in the armed forces? By my totally unscientific estimation around a third of those I meet didn’t enjoy it. Grateful for some of the experiences perhaps, or the friendships they made.  

But there are plenty of people who had a difficult time in the armed forces. It simply may not have been for them. They may have been bullied or harassed. They may have seen some of the worst aspects of humanity and are glad their time serving is over.  

Does remembrance make room for those people too?  

Like many in my generation my grandparents experienced the Second World War. I never met Mack, my grandfather on my mother’s side.  

He served as a Chindit after joining up at 14.  

I have always found him such an inspiring figure. But I never knew him. Did he struggle during his time serving? How did he look back on it? How would he have felt about remembrance? I will never know.   

But in the past I’ve fallen into the trap of thinking of him as somewhat superhuman.  

Noone I have met who served thinks they are superhuman. And I have met plenty whose time in the armed forces doesn’t sit well with them. And that’s okay.  

It’s the fact they are human and still do these things that is so impressive.  

There are (currently) 8.2 billion different ways to be a human being. Perhaps remembrance can also find a way to recognise and respect the experiences of those who did struggle with their time in the forces.  

That it’s okay.  

That still, we as a nation and civilians, want to thank them.